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Jun
16

Battle of the Sexes : Driving.

I like to consider myself a man of science. I have faith in empirical data, as a general rule. There are instances though, where you can take all your data and take a long walk off a short pier. Women drivers are one of these times when I choose to ignore the experts. Statistics show that women are better drivers. Insurance costs more for men to drive. Now, I am not so dense as to argue that the numbers are wrong. Clearly if insurance companies think men are a bigger risk, they have boatloads of evidence to back it up. Then why, you may be asking yourself, do I think women are worse drivers?

Because they are! I have almost 40 years of watching people drive that has cemented my opinion. Here is the truth in the World According To Justin propoganda machine. Women are more distracted drivers. Putting on makeup, talking on the cellphone, etc. There is an easy way for you to test this hypothesis. Go hang out in any school zone on a morning when the kids are in school. You might want to get permission so they don’t think you are Petey Pervert and throw your butt in jail. You will be ASTOUNDED by the number of women that drive past you on their cell phones. I guarantee if you run the numbers, it will top at least 80%. I think women talk on their cell phones the entire time they are in their cars. This distracted driving may very well be causing wrecks that end up being a mans fault (such as he rear ended her…*giggle*).

Secondly is a phenomena I discovered when I worked for a road striping company for a few years. Women don’t make critical decisions as fast as men. I think this is due to them being innately more cautious animals. Men, in my scientific opinion, are going to make a quick decision and go with it. Right or wrong. One time, a lady pulled right up behind one of our arrow boards and stayed there for at least 5 minutes until we walked back there and told her that she, indeed, could not turn left. A man would have gotten frustrated 4 minutes prior and peeled out around the companies vehicles…possibly causing a wreck. The lady didn’t know what to do because all she was thinking was that she wanted to go left. In another example, we had a truck in the left lane of an interstate striping the road. The operator sat on top of the truck near the rear. His wife needed to talk to him so she pulled up beside the truck, rolled down her window and started a conversation. This effectively blocked the interstate with two vehicles doing 15 mph. The husband started freaking out waving at her to get out of the way. We were lucky not to cause a 100 car pileup. All because the lady didn’t think past the fact that she wanted to talk to her husband.

I fully realize that this particular belief probably makes me a sexist pig. But damnit, when I see a small bird waddling and quacking, I cry “DUCK”. The same expression I use when you ladies get behind the wheel. :-)

What do you think MTGU. Am I full of it?

 

A video, that like this post, proves nothing. But it is funny.

Permanent link to this article: http://www.missingtheground.com/2012/06/battle-of-the-sexes-driving/

  • Harmony

    Smilyj ~ That made me (literally) laugh out loud.

    June 18 2012
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    • Harmony

      Smilyj ~ That made me (literally) laugh out loud.

      June 18 2012
      CommentsLike
      • smilyj

        This reminds me, I had a wreck one day on the interstate between Ocean Springs and Gautier. I was driving in my Dodge Ram Charger, an awesome tank like vehicle, at the time. I drive the speed limit. Very rarely above or below it. My wife hates that. This particular time of day there were very few cars. Around me there was just my truck, and when I did a routine check in the rear view mirror, another small car some distance behind me in my lane. The right lane. I did no more checks for a while, being the only vehicle around. When all of a sudden, I felt a bump at the back of my truck. It kinda just felt like when your in the bumper cars and someone hits you from the back. Well, I immediately looked up in the mirror and saw I had been hit by a small Honda accord with a young lady driving. I pulled over. She pulled behind me. We are still the only vehicles around. Maybe a few are making there way from the distance now. I get out and check my bumper. It had a small blue scratch with a little bit of a dent. I look at her smaller, newer plastic car. The front is smashed to the point it is undrivable. I look at the shaken girl. She has lipstick smeared down her cheek. She is clearly shaken that her makeup session was so violently interrupted. I asked if she was ok. She said yes and that she was so sorry, she didnt know what happened. My truck just appeared from nowhere. We traded info and she said she would call the cops. I said ok that was fine. She looked at her phone a second and then looked at me confused. “Uh, where are we?” she asked. I said Ocean Springs. Where are you from? She says’ “Ocean Springs.” Im sure I had a blank stare for a second before I politely said, It’s ok, I will call them.

        June 18 2012
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        • nelson

          In my samlpe size, me vs my wife, i can definitely say that women are rougher on vehicles. we have esssentially the same vehicles, she the expedition and me the F150. she runs through brakes and tires almost twice as fast as i do. so, not sure if that exactly correlates to your hypothesis, but it damn sure proves that they are more expensive drivers.

          June 17 2012
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          • Harmony

            I believe my husband would agree with you, he’s been on the California’s worst driving list (I haven’t) and he is constantly getting on to me about something: “Speed up,” “Slow down,” “Pass this fucker,” “Are you hoping for a ticket,” “Get off his ass.”. He is the best side-seat driver ever!

            I’m guilty of talking on the phone (but I have a headset) and a lot of women drivers are bad, but so are some men drivers. In fact, we almost had a head on collision with a guy passing a semi, everyone in our lane had to pull off into an orchard (the dick!).

            June 16 2012
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